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perfectisnotreal

Perfect Isn’t Real

“What if we tried to be brave instead of perfect.” Unknown I could not love this any more. I don’t think I could strive more for it than I do but I still fall short and so I keep trying. Perfect seems so important. How do I look? How about the kids? The house? Are […]

morticia normal

What if anxiety is a conversation with myself?

After a particularly awful anxiety attack, like the one I had this morning, it might be a time to live your life in such a way as if to say, “I’m sorry, my body just reminded me it can kill me at any given time without notice and my Self is in need of my attention. Your opinion of that is currently invalid.”

baby mabel

A Different Kind of Normal

Look at that little smunchy faced baby. It would only take her three short years from this photo to shout “I don’t love you mommy! I don’t love you and I want you to move out so Daddy will stop loving you too!” She’s thorough, at least. I probably don’t need to explain that today […]

out of the darkness

I’ve Found My Calling (I’m pretty well positive this time)

You know those folks who say things like “when it’s what you’re meant to do with your life, you’ll just know… when it’s you’re real ‪dream, there’ll be no giving up… nothing will be able to stop you…you’ll know when you find it… trust me, you’ll know..” I mean, I guess I don’t know who […]

realmendontrape

I, too, am the Stanford rape victim.

I had a dream last night that I was the Stanford rape victim. Became I am. Because I have been raped. I have been molested as a child, assaulted as an adult on a date, and raped by a stranger while completely blacked out. I have believed that these occurrences were my fault and were the natural […]

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Seasonal Depression in Vermont

Here’s a talk myself down from the ledge moment… “If the sun doesn’t come back to Vermont soon I’m just going to give up the fight and head to bed permanently. I cannot stand it anymore. Breathing is beginning to take effort. I need to hibernate. Of course, what I really need is to get […]

sswhyitakemedicine

Why I Take Medicine

I grew up in one of those families that that didn’t believe in mental illness. Depression? Anxiety? Please, everyone gets sad and nervous, get yourself together and let’s get going. Therapy? For what? Psychology is a crock. So it’s no wonder that in this environment the idea of pharmaceuticals was laughable. Not just for us, […]

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Stop Pretending To Be Okay

I feel good today. If I didn’t that’d be alright too, I suppose. I stopped pretending I was just like everyone else a couple years ago so now no one even thinks to expect it. These days I don’t even know if I believe in a ‘just like everyone else’… It’s more like a median line […]

madface

The Stigma of Society Infuriates Me

It is time for me to write something. And since, for Instagram, that means having a photograph, I thought, “I’ll take a little selfie while I’m at it.” So I picked up my phone and thought “smile for the people, Seana.” Fail. I’m a little weary these days thanks to a sick toddler and a […]

I think you're rather nice

Maybe You’re Not Crazy

This morning I read that of 78% women suspect that they have a mental illness. (NAMI) Do you know what that says to me? Pretty much no one feels okay in their own skin any more. Definitely not the women. And can you blame us? The expectation of accomplishment is ever growing, both from society and from […]