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jumping girls

Parenting With Authenticity, Not Perfection

I wholeheartedly believe in authenticity on social media. Presenting your life as perfect creates an incredibly unhealthy world and an unhealthy (and unable to be supported) you.  To that end: I often hear “you’re such a good mom” because of the pictures I post and the stories I tell on Facebook. So, you should also […]

bacon

It’s a Bacon Kind of Day

And I don’t know if it’s because I have my own mental illness that I bounce around a bit more often between the really balanced mom of awesomeness and the ‘life is stretching me’ mom of passableness and the ‘I should really get a sitter because I’m going to seriously start saying shit I might regret’ mom of awfulness, or if that’s just normal.

baby mabel

A Different Kind of Normal

Look at that little smunchy faced baby. It would only take her three short years from this photo to shout “I don’t love you mommy! I don’t love you and I want you to move out so Daddy will stop loving you too!” She’s thorough, at least. I probably don’t need to explain that today […]

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Breaking In Front of Baby

Yesterday I broke. I knew it was coming. I could feel myself getting rougher around the edges. Edgier, more impulsive, more inclined to sudden fits of rage. I’m weaning off of my mood stabilizing medication in preparation for childbirth in five weeks and the new, breastfeeding safe, medication that will start after that. I’m beginning […]

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Mom Doesn’t Play By My Rules

I’ve been trying to write about my mom for a long time. I start and I can’t finish. I just don’t know what to say. It’s just that I don’t understand. Writing is usually a way to help me understand – myself, other people, the world – but it doesn’t matter how I spin it, […]

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Maybe, just maybe, TV isn’t the actual devil.

Have you noticed that the one thing it’s totally okay for moms to feel guilty (and be made to feel guilty about) is television watching? Every post or blog that even has the word “television” in it also includes some lengthy disclaimer about types of carefully selected shows or carefully monitored time or extreme circumstances that allow for the horror that is your children watching tv.

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Gentle Parenting With A Mental Illness

I have been diagnosed as rapid cycling bipolar ii. I like to tell people it’s “not the crazy crazy kind of bipolar” but who am I kidding? I am crazy as hell some days. My mental illness results in lots of anxiety, sometimes an undercurrent and sometimes a tidal wave, and depression that ranges from […]

origami birds

I am sad. I’m afraid. I worry.

I am sad. I am sad because we’ve decided that it is time to wean our 21 month old daughter and, as a tool to help with night weaning, to move her out of the family bed and into a bed, and room, of her own. She is growing up, becoming more independent; her father […]

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Parenting on Purpose: Mothering and Mental Health

She is clinging to my leg and my skin is crawling. “Mommy is just getting you a bowl of cereal, darling, I can pick you up in just a minute.” I am hoping she can not hear the rising panic in my voice. I make sure to speak pleasantly and slowly; I work hard to […]

familyofthree

And so we are three.

I have officially and firmly decided not to have any more children. I had been on the fence about this ever since the birth of my daughter, 16 months ago. One would think that I had time and wouldn’t need to worry about it all that much just yet but at 35, and with my […]

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