Seana Speaks

And so we are three.

I have officially and firmly decided not to have any more children. I had been on the fence about this ever since the birth of my daughter, 16 months ago. One would think that I had time and wouldn’t need to worry about it all that much just yet but at 35, and with my […]

The Gift of Women

“I am only one; but still I am one. I cannot do everything; but still I can do something.” -Edward Everett Hale I can’t tell if being a mother is making me a bad person, or if, through the arduous process of becoming a mother, I am actually becoming a better person and the negative […]

We’re The Mothers Now

We are the mothers now. It is we who have homes and husbands and children and lists and explanations. We are our parents now. We are the ones in charge of a land in which having a checkbook doesn’t mean you have money and vegetables are important on a scale far larger than simply mealtime. […]

Not Perfect (and that’s okay)

Sometimes I let my daughter eat two of those pouchy nothomemade things of food for lunch. I just hand them to her, I don’t even consider a spoon, because I haven’t got the strength to be the perfect blw mom. Sometimes I sit her in front of a mother goose playlist on youtube and I […]

Everything I Asked For

Before my daughter was born, I prayed for and over her daily. I prayed that she would be strong and healthy, that she would be smart and curious, and that she would be full of joy. I did not pray that she would sleep, that she wouldn’t cling, or that her need would only equal […]

Waiting It Out

Could I let my baby cry? Could I firmly remind her that “it is time for bed” and walk away, in tears to the sound of her tears? Yes. I could. I am “strong enough”, if that’s what you believe it takes. Last night my 10.5 month old had a rough night. We had a […]

Sleep is Like An Orgasm (or, Finding Empathy)

Usually, when I watch my daughter try to fall asleep, it is with utter confusion. It’s obvious she’s tired, it’s clear that she wants to be asleep, and yet, there she is, awake. It’s unbelievable to me, the sleep deprived mom. How can she want something so badly and not be able to just give into it, […]

Waking Moment

Mabel wanted to take a nap an hour after we got up. I didn’t want to nap. I wanted to drink my hot vanilla coffee and get started in the garden before the storms hit this afternoon. Mabel is very convincing, so up to the dark and air conditioned bedroom we went. We laid down […]

Nap Oasis

My daughter requires that I lay with her for naps. She’s 8.5 months old and stirs awake between sleep cycles. If I am here beside her she will stir, her gaze will find me, and sometimes she’ll drift back to sleep. More often than that, she will stir with closed eyes and open mouth, rooting […]

Cartoon Me

What mothers mean: “Today I went to the grocery store. I pushed around the cart with one hand, managing to avoid every obstacle in the course, because my other hand was helping the baby, in a carrier strapped to the front of me, nurse. I also kept track of how much I was spending on […]