Seana Speaks

the meaning of life

As we walked I prayed some and thought some, feeling the attention of a very large and very personal God. My prayers covered a variety of things but, as Bella and I turned back toward home, something seemed to spring out at me from the jumble of prayer thoughts. The meaning of life, of course. What else would one discover on a silent morning of sparkling dew and fluffy white puppies?

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Epiphany (one): I’ve been judging you.

I war against judgment and believe in acceptance of a person for humanity’s sake without regard to the how and why of their life and lifestyle. It’s true that change is a beautiful and necessary part of growth and redemption and true liberation, but it would be wrong to allow any perception I may have of how you should or could change affect whether or not I can embrace you for who you are in your today. I have not extended that grace to myself.

reasons to stay tuned…

However, I have said before and will say again, it is our secrets that make us sick. I’ve no interest in illness. The walk to God is not filled with all things holy and reverent. Look at David! Read the Psalms. Goodness, read anything in the Old Testament and you’ll soon begin to realize that, most often, the road to God is actually a series of wrong turns.

tightrope

An except from my journal, “Why is it so hard to stay riveted on God?! Why when I freely proclaim and hold such gratitude for all that He’s done for me and that He’s saved me from, do I so quickly ‘burn out’?  Is it the same peculiar personality trait that makes me an addict […]

the look of success

I’m not going to do anything stupid. Today. It’s only that… the beast that lives within seems to have awoken with voracious appetite i want to devour all things deadly and destructive to sicken myself to the point of normalcy restless and impatient and rebelliously creative i want to find the line just to cross […]

who are you am i

who are you inside my head clawing out a space like redecorating is somehow your perogative who are you that sends me plummeting full speed from 60 to 0 without warning i’m not standing for it anymore who are you with wicked laugh and mocking smile that whispers lies and expects belief who are you […]

friendship isn’t love

i am wide awake tired running on all cylinders trying to forget   you’re not real again   i know every time i try every time it’s the same trying to forget   friendship is different than love and expectation sometimes i forget   i’m sorry i made you up again

Liberated

No more shallow living driven by every compulsion, the unspoken code of the Beautiful People, the Tragically Hip… no more wishing for daylight to pass so you can shut out your emptiness by using a drink (or a scene or a person)… no more being an It Girl masking fearful emptiness… no more pretentious social […]