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Family Isn’t Permanent

I used to be part of a family. A large, mostly happy family; a family filled with love and a strong attachment to one another. Or that’s the way I seem to remember it. Growing up there were six of us. My mother and father (technically step-father but he was with us from the time […]

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(Some of) The Things I Did

The shame of sexual abuse is strong and lingering. Though my now fully developed, grown up brain tells me that, as a child, I could not be held responsible for the actions of those much older than myself, that abuse is not ever the fault of the victim, there is still a huge piece of […]

Accepting yourself

Break the Silence; Break the Stigma

I don’t know most of the people who follow my Facebook page at this point. It’s an incredible and humbling thing, to be allowed to speak on topics so personal to total strangers. I confess, I pretend that you are *all* strangers, that no one I know reads this. I pretend, while I write, that I […]

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I am sad. I’m afraid. I worry.

I am sad. I am sad because we’ve decided that it is time to wean our 21 month old daughter and, as a tool to help with night weaning, to move her out of the family bed and into a bed, and room, of her own. She is growing up, becoming more independent; her father […]

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I Hate Relationships

I hate relationships. It’s a terribly unfeminine trait, I know. But I do. I hate them, I always have. I hate the confusion of them, the work of them, the upkeep. I feel calmer and more at peace with myself when I am not responsible to or for anyone. When the first and final opinion […]

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I Would Have Given Up On Me

Coming home from work tonight an old karaoke song came on the radio. “Nothing Compares 2 U” by Sinead O’Connor. I’d learned it, and performed it, with the sole purpose of winning back my ex-girlfriend. It worked, beautifully and miserably. Beautifully because – yay success! And miserably because – wow, we really should never have […]

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Parenting on Purpose: Mothering and Mental Health

She is clinging to my leg and my skin is crawling. “Mommy is just getting you a bowl of cereal, darling, I can pick you up in just a minute.” I am hoping she can not hear the rising panic in my voice. I make sure to speak pleasantly and slowly; I work hard to […]

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If I Smoked Pot, I Would Want To Tell You

If marijuana was a legal substance, and were I to smoke it, I would want to tell you about it. If you’re a regular reader of mine you know I don’t like to keep secrets or, rather, I don’t like to present a half truth. For me, if I am to share with you how […]

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I Don’t Want To Stay Quiet

I want to open up fully To become eviscerated, To carve myself from the stench of these rotting bones. I want to liberate my mind To unfasten my tongue, To curiously consume the everything of an open reality. I want to be known, To be heard, To understand the limits of love and, if there […]

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In The Web of a Narcissist

Here is another brilliant piece written by my friend, Jill Lillis, who is going through her own process of recovery and redemption. I find her insights incredible. I hope you do, too.  It seems important at the place I have arrived at in my journey to continue on as the Spirit leads me in greater […]

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